I Write Pretty Songs for Men How to Achieve Sexy
May 042010

Thinking Man

 

To me, the perfect bowel movement is one that requires no wiping.

I don’t have the confidence, however, to evacuate my bowels without wiping — at least once — to confirm that everything is clean.

Thus, every time I sit down on the toilet, I’m setting myself up for failure.

 

How terribly, terribly sad.

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